Gossip

What is WiFi? Finally, an answer!

Your Sniffer was idly watching the packets flow by from Minneapolis, when suddenly, a thrilling news story was posted.

The headline came from a local newspaper in that city, where (as you know from our  earlier story) they plan to have WiFi all over the town. And, as if by telepathy, we seemed to hear a voice from the newspaper offices:

"But what" (asked one of the copy editors angrily, "is WiFi? Are we and our readers just supposed to know?"

And so a full explanation was posted. For those of you who want to know "What is Wi-Fi?" (the headline on the piece) but who don't want to register with the Star Tribune, the story - in its entirety - read:

"Short for "wireless fidelity," Wi-Fi offers multiple computer users low-cost high-speed Internet access through a wireless radio frequency connection."

So now, if you didn't know before, you do know. Whether the typical music teacher or bus driver or landscape gardener will actually understand that...? well, heck! it's an accurate definition, right? so someone must understand it.

Just in case they didn't, here's our explanation:

WiFi is a wireless network system designed to enrich consultants, who can walk around metropolitan areas noting how many "insecure" networks there are, and threatening that unless they get a fee to fix the problem, the Mob and other hardened criminals will break into your computers and plant pornographic images, steal your secrets, and hack your bank account. It is vastly superior to wired Ethernet networks, where organised criminals can do a hundred times as much damage, because these consultants cannot prevent Internet hacks - and so there's no revenue opportunity for them.