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So there's this problem with Iraq. It doesn't have a proper cellphone network. The idea, then, is to build one just as soon as possible after the war finishes. But (says the Congressman) not a GSM network. That's French!

Yes, really. In the country where potato chips have stopped being French fries and have turned into Patriot Fries because of President Chirac's UN veto, Congressman Darrell Issa isn't going to allow a French wireless system to pollute the bright new dawn in Persia.

French? Yes! GSM stands for Groupe Speciale Mobile. French!

So Issa has written to Donald Rumsfeld:

Dear Secretary Rumsfeld:

We understand that the United States Armed Forces and the U.S. Reconstruction and Civil Affairs Office are planning to deploy a cell phone system in Iraq that will be used by these and other organizations to meet immediate post-conflict mobile communications requirements. We presume that this system would be operated by the United States for a period of time and then privatized. We understand that decisions about the rollout of this system are being made in real time.

We have learned that planners at the Department of Defense and USAID are currently envisioning using Federal appropriations to deploy a European-based wireless technology known as GSM ("Groupe Speciale Mobile" - this standard was developed by the French) for this new Iraqi cell phone system.

If European GSM technology is deployed in Iraq, much of the equipment used to build the cell phone system will be manufactured in France by Alcatel, in Germany by Siemens, and elsewhere in western and northern Europe. Therefore, if our understanding of this situation is correct, because of ill-considered planning, the U.S. government will soon hand U.S. taxpayer dollars over to French, German, and other European cell phone equipment companies to build the new Iraqi cell phone system. This is not acceptable.

U.S. developed CDMA (code-division multiple access) cell phone technology is widely recognized as technically superior to European GSM technology and is deployed in 50 nations worldwide. In addition, we understand that CDMA cell phones include an integrated global positioning system (GPS) feature that allows the precision location of callers in times of emergency. European GSM cell phones do not have integrated GPS. If U.S. relief workers in Iraq are equipped with CDMA cell phones with GPS, they will be immediately locatable in case of terrorist attack or kidnapping. Finally, because U.S. CDMA systems are compliant with the U.S. Communications Assistance for Law Enforcement Act, this system provides all necessary access for law enforcement in post-conflict Iraq.

Finally, we understand that there are already quickly deployable U.S. commercial proposals to commence immediately with the installation of U.S. CDMA technology in Iraq. Hundreds of thousands of American jobs depend on the success of U.S.-developed wireless technologies like CDMA. If the U.S. government deploys U.S- developed CDMA in Iraq, then American companies will manufacture most of the necessary equipment here in the United States.

We urge you to use American developed CDMA cell phone technology. Thank you for your consideration on this important matter.

You don't believe me, do you. Check out Unstrung's story.